From the March 1999 Idaho Observer:

Idahoans coronate king in likeness of president

by Marvin Gardner

Boy, did you catch last January's inaugural ceremonies for Dirk Kempthorne? Wasn't that something -- him standing way up there above everybody else with huge stars right above him and judges, generals, ex-governors and other politicians standing behind him?

Actually, it was more of a coronation than an inauguration, and it was deliberately designed to be that way.

The entire ceremony (which, by the way, was a totally phony “show” for the peasants' benefit) could just as well (better, in fact) have been held at any number of other sites in the city: Inside the Capitol building, in any of several buildings at the Boise State University, at the Centre on the Grove, and at any one of several hotels in Boise -- all have more than adequate facilities and they would have all been indoors to boot.

But that would never do, because the entire show was staged for the psychological effect it would have on its audience, both those physically present and those watching on television (For the record: I spent nearly a decade being paid for setting up and running shows, conventions, ceremonies, pageants, etc., from California to New York. So I have some idea whereof I speak).

Kempthorne and the “dignitaries” could have just as easily (and more cheaply) stood on the top level of the Capitol steps: They would have been at exactly the same height and the same public address system would have worked exactly as well as it did. But that staging would have psychologically (in the audience's minds) reduced Kempthorne to “human” level. He would not have been towering above “the plebeians” as they (literally) clustered at his feet, uncomfortably straining their necks upward to look at “Caesar”(Lots of practical psychology at work there).

Then there were those huge stars just above his head. Think of that symbolism: Only the gods dwell among the stars; mere mortals do not.

Welcome to the imperial reign of governor Dirk Clinton.

Or is it Bill and Hillary Kempthorne? It's difficult to tell them apart.

Consider...

Remember 1993? Bill Clinton had no sooner taken office as President than he told the nation that the unelected Hillary was going to be taking an activist role in running this nation, hastening to explain that, “You got two for the price of one (hyuk hyuk) -- she won't cost you one penny extra.”

Remember this year? Dirk Clinton had no sooner taken office as governor than he told us that the unelected Patricia was going to be taking an activist role in running this state, also hastening to explain that “she won't get a salary so she won't cost Idahoans one penny extra.”

And exactly as Hillary may not have received a salary but she has cost the taxpayers hundreds of millions of dollars in her “official” travels (both, here at home and to dozens of foreign nations), her personal staff, security, and office expenses, Patricia Kempthorne is going to cost Idaho taxpayers hundreds of thousands of dollars in her “official” travels, her personal “assistant,” and her office expenses.

The comparison doesn't end there...

In Clinton's “State of the Nation” address last January, someone in Rush Limbaugh's organization counted Clinton speaking the word “child” or “children” 23 times in a speech that took 77 minutes (not counting applause time) to deliver. That means that Clinton invoked the magic “children” mantra once every three minutes and 21 seconds.

In his “State of the State” address that same month, Kempthorne uttered the magic words 29 times (31 times if you include the euphemism “kid”) in a speech that took only 45.5 minutes, for an average of once every 1 minute and 28 seconds -- more than twice as frequently as Clinton!

And anyone who has watched more than one Clinton press conference, “town hall meeting,” or public address knows that he is obsessed with himself, putting virtually every subject in terms of “I.” Again, he is a piker compared to Kempthorne. In his “State of the State” speech, Kempthorne spoke the “I” word 139 times, or once every 19.6 seconds. And if you add the 45 times he said “me,” “my,” or “mine” you get our self-absorbed governor -- when he was supposed to be talking about this state -- using the first person pronoun (speaking about himself) every 15 seconds -- four times every minute.

While he was supposed to be telling us about the condition of our state, he rambled on and on about himself, his wife, the political hacks he is appointing, his plans for traveling (out of state -- even out of nation) at taxpayers' expense, his college days, his employment history, his early co-workers, proposing to his wife, his personal experiences as governor, his time in the U.S. Senate, and his “social” (that's the current politically-correct euphemism for “closet communist”) agenda for all of us.

The only thing he didn't say was, “I feel your pain.”

Does anyone care to claim that Kempthorne does not think that he is Idaho? That the rest of us do count in his mind?

More intriguing parallels...

The (real) Clintons say that it takes a village to raise a child. Dirk Kempthorne does them one better -- again -- by insisting that it takes the entire state to raise each child (Obviously neither one can conceive of its being the parents' obligation to raise their own offspring).

In another place in his speech Kempthorne, citing the $9.3 million the Department of Energy paid the state (in settlement over INEL at Arco) said that that money will be used to “create over 2,000 jobs.” If he had bothered to figure it all out, he would have discovered that $9.3 million will cover 2,000 jobs only to the extent of $4,650 each. That's only $2.32 per hour for a full time (2,000 hours per year) job. That's way less than minimum wage. So the question is, is Kempthorne really so stupid as to think that that money would create 2,000 jobs, or does he simply believe that we are so stupid we couldn't figure it out?

And does that “government arithmetic” not sound like Clinton creating “100,00 teacher jobs” with $1 billion in federal money when those jobs would be able to pay only $10,000 each? And the “100,000 policemen” with another ridiculous $1 billion?

And lastly, remember Kempthorne's statement “Who would have ever thought that this U of I grad (speaking -- as usual -- of himself) working for the Department of Lands would someday become the president of the Idaho Land Board?”

The answer to that question is an unequivocal “Dirk Kempthorne.” It is well reported that Bill Clinton decided in high school that he wanted to be president. Obviously so did Dirk Kempthorne because, straight out of high school, he enrolled in college as a political science major.

Welcome to the imperial reign of Emperor Dirk Clinton!

In future articles we will point out many of the lies Kempthorne has publicly spoken, who he really listens to, and we will even lay out the evidence that proves his lifelong plan for becoming president. We will also--from time to time--look at other state officials.

Oh, yes. We said earlier that the big inaugural ceremony was a fake staged simply to psychologically impress the people of Idaho. Well, he was actually sworn in days earlier, in a private ceremony. The “Big Show” that Friday was nothing more or less than a show for the rubes' benefit!

Kempthorne collected (at least) $32,000 more in campaign contributions than he spent. So why did the taxpayers of Idaho have to pay almost $29,000 for his inauguration festivities?

Did you know the governor receives $4,000 per month for “housing expenses”

Copyright, 1999, by Liberty Tree. All rights reserved.

Syndicated by Liberty Tree, libertytree@lesbois.com